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My father is dying. He’s in hospice care, at home, where he wants to be. But no one wants to die like this.

After multiple falls causing a few broken bones, a long stay in the hospital, and an even longer stay in a rehab center, he developed severe difficulty with swallowing. There is no good solution for that; all that could be offered was a feeding tube.  This is a tube that would be placed either into his nose and snaked down to his stomach, or via surgery with a tube in his stomach exiting his abdomen. With a feeding tube, he wouldn’t have to swallow so he could receive hydration and nutrients, but he also wouldn’t be able to taste food. It would give him life but not allow him to live. He declined it and came home to die.

But he’s not dying of the broken bones, and he’s not dying of early dementia, diagnosed about two years prior to all of this. No, he’s dying of dehydration and starvation. This is not quick. As his daughter and as a veterinarian, it’s also not easy to watch. I’m trained in veterinary forensics and animal abuse. Since an animal cannot tell an owner that it does or does not want a feeding tube, it is considered criminal to allow an animal to die this way.

Several months ago, I was presented with a case for consultation. An elderly dog had fallen and scraped his skin raw, like skinned knees in children. His owner took him inside and lay him on the floor. That is where he remained for the next many days, almost two weeks. The person who reported the concerns for animal abuse found this dog covered in diarrhea and not eating or drinking. He also had maggots infesting the wounds. Less than a day after this report, the dog died. His owner may be charged with criminal neglect for not providing him with freedom from hunger, thirst, and pain, a few of the basic tenets of animal care

If the owner had brought him in after the fall, or even as soon as he stopped eating a few days later, there could have been a discussion about his options. One of those may have been a feeding tube. One of them could have been euthanasia. What would not have been acceptable would have been for the owner to take the dog home to slowly die from dehydration and starvation. That would be considered inhumane.

I know the decision not to have a feeding tube placed was my father’s, as was the decision to come home on hospice care. He was lucid and capable of making that decision at that time. (Just today, when I was with him, he remained lucid, continuing to talk and make jokes with me.) He knew what it meant. But what an awful way to go. He’s not dying from the fractured bones or the dementia. He’s dying because he can no longer take in food and water, and the only options at his age – a feeding tube or slowly dying – are hard to comprehend as a veterinarian. My family and the hospice caretakers are doing our best to keep him clean and comfortable as this all unfolds.

Nevertheless, I can’t help but feel that this, this method of death? I wouldn’t inflict this upon a dog. But there are no other options for my father.